Model Of The World

I am currently in Paris with my partner Laurie taking a short pause from the world of NLP and Coaching and making the time to share more adventures with my friend and life partner.

A few days ago we shared a whole afternoon exploring Notre Dame Cathedral and we were both impressed by the incredible works of art housed inside the Cathedral and the craftsmanship and artwork evident in the construction of Notre Dame herself.

Like the good and enthusiastic tourists we can be, we bough an electronic tour, that comprises of a recorded voice ( in English, which was good for us ) that arrives in what would pass for a child’s walkie-talkie that can be started and stopped at various points through the tour walk of ‘Our Lady in Paris’ as well as a little map, depicting points of interest.

So we each took our map, our walkie-talkie and set off. Taking our time to appreciate various statues, carvings, frescos, painting and sculptures. And we talked, held hands and kissed a great deal. Believe it or not Notre Dame is not just a romantic cathedral it was for me on that day filled with a very palpable love.

Towards the end of our three hour exploration and adventure, we stopped, talked and kissed. Some time into our kissing, we were interrupted by a seemingly agitated French woman. She was very smartly dressed and carrying some new shoes in a bag.

Her interruption was a verbal one. She hissed some very agitated French at us. Neither of us quite understanding we asked “êtes-vous OK?”, in my best French and again after another exchange which was both to fast and beyond my current French vocabulary to understand I asked, “parlez-vous anglais?”

Her reply was “show respect!! show respect!!” and then having shared, as she walked away we resumed and continued kissing.

Now, in mine and certainly Laurie’s model of the world, a cathedral IS a place of spirituality and love and that is exactly what we were doing, kissing, expressing our love to and for each other. Our French sister to me clearly has different values and world view.

Can we both be ‘right’? Yes of course!

Laurie has suggested if that ever happens again ( we do like to kiss  ) we should either kiss the person or give them a hug!

Happy New Year 2010
Bonne Année 2010

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My good friend and college Kim Bull of Adventurous Minds has uploaded a you-tube video of part of his ‘NLP for Sports excellence’ training about how we as humans process information.

Kim is an excellent NLP Trainer who incorporates fun and relevancy within all the learning and discovery methods he facilitates.

This video describes in very understandable ways the linguistic model concepts of Generalisation, Distortion and Deletion.

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Salve ( no this is not a viagra advert ), its the traditional Roman greeting.

See, we all have our views and perspectives. We all have our ways and opinions of what is right and wrong, acceptable and what we believe in or at least believe should be.

NLP, that archaic and unsubstantiated word is one methodology of, amongst others, of getting someone elses perspective on things. If you don’t, it is a way of proving yourself right no matter what the cost. Preaching from a chair perhaps.

The real world is very different, the real world is where we come from…

Here is a short video, unearthing what can happen when our world view is so fixed that we ( I smile when I write we )  construct and interpolate what someone else is attempting to convey.

This is an exert from one of our IntegrityNLP practitioner training in 2008.

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Harry Knox of IntegrityNLP is presenting “Why Brief Therapy is still too long” at TyneMet college, Newcastle upon Tyne.

This presentation will see Harry’s own unique insights from over 30 years experience working as a mental health professional.

20th November 2008
6.30 - 9.00 pm

To book your place on this event contact Helen Tansey 0191 229 5163

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WARNING! This is extremely controversial!

This is currently one of the most popular internet videos available.

I post the link because - it is also an excellent demonstration of Beliefs and Values in action. It may be a fake. But it has currently been watched by over four and a half MILLION people.

Irrespective of its authenticity, lets assume this is just cinema. A projection of actors beliefs and values. An example is worth more than one thousand written words …

What is educational are the many Beliefs and Values that are conveyed in the conversation.

LISTEN TO THE AUDIO

What may be an even more powerful example of beliefs in action is your own, you own responses to this audio. But DO note the end of the audio when the ‘prank’ all becomes clear!

This will lead nicely into the next NLP Demystified post ‘Model of The World’

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One of the recurrent themes in any excellent NLP Practitioner course , or great application of therapy is to create the context for your own or your clients beneficial change. Another description for this is Reframing. Reframing is about changing how experiences are being perceived.

This clearly dovetails into the concepts of Description, Interpretation and Evaluation, three of the most important distinctions you can make, now,

One of the most thought provoking and exceptional people of the 21st century is Robert Anton Wilson. Bob Wilson has written many many books on many many varied subjects. One particularly excellent book ‘Quantum Psychology‘ gives us a wonderful example of these types of so very necessary distinctions.

The example cited comes in the form of the work of Albert Ellis. Here are two examples of less than positive and enabling statements about a persons ‘reality’. In NLP terms a seemingly impoverished model of the world, in every day language an interpretation of actuality.

1. My boss is a male chauvinist drunk, and this is making me sick.
2. My secretary is an incompetent, whining bitch, and I have no choice but to fire her.

By simply reformulating the verbal description, the complex equivalents and cause effects diffuse, some generalisations, distortions and deletions are alleviated BUT even more importantly the distinctions between descriptions, evaluations and interpretations become clearer.

1. I perceive my boss as a male chauvinist drunk, and right now I do not ( or will not ) perceive or remember anything else about him, and framing my experience this way, ignoring other factors, makes me feel unwell.
2. I perceive my secretary as an incompetent, whining bitch, and right now I do not ( or will not ) perceive or remember anything else about her, and framing my experience this way, ignoring other factors, inclines me to make the choice of firing her.

All NLP and therapy is essentially reframing. This is just yet another way to make it so.

nigel hetherington

Communicating Excellence
Excellence in Neuro Linguistic Programming and Hypnotherapy

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